ambie_66

why is it so hard to be completely honest with someone that is so close to you? someone that had always been so honest with you in everything? how do u tell someone something when you know it might hurt them or make them mad?

this sucks...

Have you ever gotten to the point where you just decided that you think about things too much? Or that the more you think about it, the worse it seems?...

Have you ever thought that you're making something into nothing?...

Have you ever been hurt by someone that you thought you'd never be hurt by? Maybe not necessarily hurt, just surprised by? And by surprised, not in a good way. Disappointed, maybe is a good word...

Have you ever thought that you knew someone so well and they do something to you, something that is actually unintentional and they don't even realize it, but you're too afraid that if you tell them, it will hurt them in some way...

Have you ever been afraid to start something new? Or to leave something old that you have grown so comfortable with and so accustomed to?...

Have you ever been afraid that you're going to screw things up? That maybe this new start you have to make is going to be something you'll mess up or not succeed at. But you don't have any other choice but to do it anyways...

Have you ever been in love? Where it's all you think about, dream about, or talk about?...

Have you ever met someone that you KNOW you want to spend the rest of your life with, no matter what?...

Have you ever met someone that means more to you than anything in the world?...

Have you ever had something that you're terrified of losing?...

Have you ever met someone that seems to complete you?...

Have you ever met someone that makes you want to be a different, better person?...



...I have

so yesterday, wednesday, we played our first game in the district tournament and we won! we won 11-1 in the 6th inning. i played a good game and was excited. i caught and fly ball to center field in the first inning, went 3 for 4 batting, had 3 RBI's, and scored 2 runs. i was on fire!! haha...not really, but i worked hard and it played off yesterday. everyone did well last night. i think it's pretty safe to say it was our best game all season. we all worked hard and worked together as a team and we came out victorious in the end! tomorrow night we play in the district championship game. i'm so excited, i can't contain myself. last week, i was so ready for softball to be over, but right now, i am just so excited to get out there and play!! we have a good chance to win tomorrow night and if we play anything like we did last night and come with the same attitude, we're gunna smoke um!!

saturday night is prom! 2 days...im excited! plans have been so freakin messed up, it's not even funny. prom plans...seriously, how hard could it freakin be? obviously very difficult...and i learned that the hard way this year. i never knew it would be so difficult to get 8 people to agree on something. not even anything big, just one simple thing. but finally, things are all worked out, i hope!! if anything else goes wrong between now and saturday, i think i will drive myself there and forget about everyone because im sick of dealing with freakin drama. we're supposed to be seniors in high school and we're acting like we're in 5th grade. it's ridiculous. but whatever...as long as things run smoothly from here on out.

so anyways, wish us good luck tomorrow night!! we could be bringing home the first district title for softball at TC!! can't wait to whoop some bulldog but!!

so things at school and softball and prom plans have just been a little too stressful and frustrating lately. first of all, i am trying so hard to stay focused with school for the remaining 21 days or so. twenty-one days left!! 21 days left of my high school career. that so scary!! there are people who can't wait to leave and to be honest, i'm kind of scared. maybe it's because i'll be leaving the comfort of a small enviroment that i've grown used to. but i guess that means i can grow comfortable in a new place. but don't get me wrong, i am so excited about it as well. i mean, high school is over and i'm going to college. what the heck? where did time go? it's crazy....but very exciting at the same time.

prom plans are just getting on my nerves. making prom plans and all that stuff is supposed to be exciting and fun and all i want to do is say 'forget it all, i'm going in a car by myself.' but it's senior prom and it's supposed to be perfect and lots of fun and a great memory....but right now, all it is is a big headache i and getting sick of. whatever, anyways...

so i'm pretty sure that softball makes my blood pressure go up. it stresses me out like crazy!! UUUHHHHH!! that's all i can say. UHHH!!! i work my butt off and it seems like i'm getting nowhere. i want to prove myself, the fact that i can do it and i want to be able to play my hardest. it's really discouraging when you think you did a decent job in practice, when you think you did your best, when you think you worked your butt off and have bruises and cuts from diving for balls in the outfield and someone makes a comment to you about the way you practiced. it really got me down today. i was so upset. for some reason, i get tears in my eyes when i get really pissed and frustrated but today i just cried, literally. i was so angry, pissed, upset, discouraged, just blah!!

but when i got home from practice, shawn called me and i told him about my bad day at practice and how upset i was and (truthfully, i don't know how he does it) but he made me laugh. he was walking through publix talking about random things, reading random stuff and making me laugh the whole time. i totally forgot about being upset. he's a blessing to have. i love him<3

my mom, lindsey, and i went shopping today. AND I GOT MY PROM DRESS! i am so excited!! it isn't at all was i was looking for, but i love it!! i can't wait to wear it. i have tried it on a total of four times today...just in a matter of a few hours because i love it!! prom : 26 days

we had a softball game today, which we won 11-8. i did pretty good, i was proud. i played left field and i caught 2 balls, went 4-4 batting (2 walks, 1 hit with a pitch, and 1 niiice hit to center field), scored 2 runs, 3 RBI's, and 5 steals! i was excited to say the least.

im really tired now....actually...im really tired of it being freaking cold on my spring break. i want beach weather and im sitting here in pants and a hoodie...what the heck!??!

anyways....off to bed.......good night

one of the things i hate to see the most is when nice people aren't treated as well as they should be. i hate seeing happy people sad because of what another person says or does.

for some reason it's always the nice people that are taken advantage of. why is that? there aren't that many really nice people in the world and you get some idiot who comes along and feels the need to be mean or rude. and THAT pisses me off.

i just wanna tell all of you nice people out there that you're amazing and no matter what, don't let someone change the way you are because they are rude or inconciderate.

(you know who you are....)

so tonight was awesome. trish and i went to see elizabeth at her first day of work! (she is the most amazing t.f. employee....ever)afterwards, we went to target and met elizabeth there, too. it was pretty interesting. gobstoppers are pretty much the most amazing candy.

uh, so i have always found it very entertaining to sit and watch people in a place such as a mall. well, we did that tonight and i truly is very entertaining....seriously. i love just sitting and watching people....especially when they have no idea someone if watching them being completely stupid.

you know what is so unbelievable....when little boys around the age of 14 walk up to you and ask you if you would like to accompany them to the movies. uh...can i get a "what the hell?" alrighty, so these kids walk up to us not once, but they have enough nerve to ask twice! if we would like to go to the movies with them. you'd think regection from 3 girls at one time was a hint that is was a definate NO and even the second time, a NO. but ok, let's just ask twice...just incase they didn't notice that we were nasty grungy little smelly boys....ok COOL!!

we watched the movie "Just Friends". It was good....so freakin hilarious!! it's one of those movies that has those awesome funny parts and you rewind about 5 times to see it over and over again. i love it...

im glad trish and i got to hang out...we haven't done that in a while. and i'm glad we got to talk....cuz obviously there was some catching up...anyways....it was good to do that!! ( ince the boys were both busy tonight anyways!! haha)

so im crazy tired right now....and i need a prom dress. wow, i just thought about that. i should probably get on that..soon. since i have about 25 days before prom. but hey, it's all good.

back to me being tired....i am sleepy........omg and it's spring break day 1!!! how exciting!! i'm excited...i need a break from school......even though i will miss high school when we leave this year, but im sure i will get over it...quickly.

alright...so im off to bed.........to all the world, a goodnight.

We're always looking for love and meaning in our lives. Some people find it in a career, some people find it in another person, some people find it in material things, some people find it simply in the little things in life. Where ever we find it, whether we were looking for it or not, we can't help but notice it. It's almost as if there was a part of us missing and once we find that missing puzzle piece, we feel complete; we find that love and that meaning for our lives.

I am a lucky person because I have a lot of love and meaning in my life; some old and some new but both equally important. The newest addition to this wonderful concept is a person in my life. Someone who was in my life years ago and made a sudden reappearance a few months ago. It's funny how things work out that way; having someone in your life at a certain point and not knowing how much they will come to mean to you. This person has had an incredible impact on my life. I can't help but wonder how I made it seventeen years without this person by my side the whole time. It's almost impossible for me to mention this person's name without a smile on my face and warm feeling in my heart. There is a quote, "True love is your soul's recognition of its counterpoint in another." (yes, I did steal that from Wedding Crashers)But that's exactly how I feel, simply put.

So my advice to anyone reading this...If you have someone in your life like this, don't let go. Hold on as tight as you can, don't let it slip away. If you don't have someone like this, keep looking. It might not be right in front of you, but it's worth the wait.

(I am reading a book called 'To See You Again.' That's where all of these thoughts came from. It's about a Jewish girl during WWII and how she is separated from the love of her life because of the war and her search for him and life after the war. I recommend this book to everyone, even if it seems like something you wouldn't be interesting in; trust me, you will be as soon as you open it. Anyways, not all of my entries will be like this, it was just something I wanted to get out. And I can't promise I will be completely dedicated to LJ but I will try my best to update it!! Enjoy....)